Love, and Life. Hello, and Goodbye. It’s all an Everlasting Train.
Faint as the pale glow on a frozen morning
Fine wisps of cloud
Breathe the cold air, unwilling
To stir silence, so rare
Remember, it’s only one life
Find it
Make it worth living
Where? Is it fear or frustration
Or pity that brings tears
Sometimes we forget that we run so we don’t have to accept that we’re not getting anywhere.
And that’s that.
He’s at the University of Michigan, does research in software. I’m in Tokyo, I design web systems. We were talking about snowboarding…
12:55:48 PM: it started snowing again here, but I don’t have time off.. had to work today :(
12:58:36 PM: too bad…
12:58:55 PM: I feel like playing hooky in the middle of the week and doing a day trip :P
1:05:54 PM: I wanna go >:(
all this snow gonna melt by the time I can take time off
1:12:13 PM: can’t you take a day off?
1:28:57 PM: nah, not for the next two weeks
got site visits from the army and secret service coming up.. need to get our junk into gear
1:33:36 PM: geh… dude,.. you realize how bad that looks in writing :P
1:35:53 PM: heheh
Strange strange world…
What the heck should I do with my life?
In other news, was surfing the anime blogging world when I came across this. The post itself was great (for obvious reasons…), but I think the true gem was the comment below >:D
Who says money can’t buy happiness? Ever since I bought a gas heater (23,800yen) and humidifier (7,980yen) a few weeks ago, life in my icebox room has been positively cozy. Today I also got around to fixing up some new shelves, DIY style again, and re-rearranging my room. Most of my manga now has a proper home as opposed to a heap on the floor, and Peter Drucker and Blue Ocean Strategy sit next to Yuri Hime and BIRZ, not because I take perverse joy in mixing genres but because they are the same height (25-26cm). I like how everything is turning out, especially with my cardboard cutout of Saber sitting on top of my stereo :D
It was overall a very productive day. In addition to the shelves, I also bought boots, binding and board, woohoo! Spent a crapload of money, but dang these boots are the most comfortable I’ve ever had. 20 of us are going boarding this weekend, can’t wait! Snow and riding in the day, hot bath, alcohol and people I like at night. Hm, work’s gonna be a bugger this week :P
In other news, I sorted my iTunes library in order of playcount, and grabbed everyone over 6 times and ran it on random all day. It’s pretty funky. I don’t think my playcount for my iPod is reflected though, which is kinda a pity.
My passport is expiring in April, and so I spent all morning at the Thai Consulate in Tokyo waiting and waiting and waiting. It was crowded as hell with what seemed like all the Thai people in Tokyo and more, all wanting to do something or another at the exact section I needed to go to.
Or course, there’s only one section for Thai people, the other being for Japanese people who want to spend the retirement years on a beach in Phuket. That was far less packed, which is saying a lot.
So I wait forever, and I have to get them to fill out the form for me in Thai, because while I can read and write Thai, I pretty dismal at it and it’s not worth additional stress to save a 200yen form-filling fee. At least they didn’t stare at me with one eyebrow raised and go, “How can you be Thai and not speak Thai?” It doesn’t piss me off, it just makes me deeply embarassed. I was born and grew up in a different country, okay? But then when I go back home I have to explain why I’m not really Malaysian. Headache. Blaim the Thai father and Indonesian mother for meeting and getting married in Penang :P
So I gotta wait all day. Bleh! I thought this would take one hour, tops! Not to mention, yah gotta wait outside. It’s 5C outside. It’s cold. There isn’t enough time during their lunch hour for me to go back to the office, so instead I’m sitting on a bench in the fancy Meguro Station building, and I’ve checked out foodcourt and the import grocery and cafe and bakery… goddammit, don’t they have anything other than food stores?! Oh yes, found bookstore. Bought 3 manga on a whim. Would wander HMV but I’m too sleepy. Maybe I’ll hunt for a shelve at MUJI. Gee, I should be working, but not working is actually too much fun.
I did make a long phone call to the office asking the engineering guys to carry on with their work. So there.
PS, Mai Otome is seriously starting to suck. I’m talking about Arika’s little, um, conflict of interest. Bleh. More Fate! More Rin! More Archer! Saber! Saber! Rin!
My latest project centers around integration consumer generated content with “officially-produced” news and writing. At its most mundane, you slap a news site with a blog site and kinda hope for the best.
This is, without saying, the best path to failure. It fails to take into account:
1) the fact that most people produce content where they damn well please, and odds are it won’t be your site
2) that just stitching people content and news content together with some keywords and tags will result in something no better than hastily stitched together patchwork quilt
3) the very real difficulty of weeding out useful content, not to mention content that is useful to me, which is all that matters to people, anyway
I’ve been reading up on Web2.0. Web2.0 is zooming, and although the general public has no clue, one day you’ll wake up and your life will be Web2.0, and everyone will be Web2.0 and no-one will realize it.
Which brings me to…
Stuff happening in the web world which scares me shitless, as a web idea person
1) MyWeb, which according to Troutgirl is server-side bookmarking and tagging, finding out what the rest of the crowd is reading, and human-powered search engine (whatever that means)
2) Technorati, which lets you see what blogs are linking to your article
3) Super cheap online storage and the tools to go with it, because dammit that’s as good as having on your site
4) Huge conglomerates moving into online classified, because mass is money (as eBay knows), and money begets… more money, and if they had the money to deal local and cut out the small folk…
5) Microsoft’s RSS extension, which is bilateral as opposed to unilateral, and while I can’t really think of a practical app at the moment, it’s gotta be good for something
6) RSS feeds feeding content, and the people who have figured out how to track all that shit
And more, although I can’t remember. Knowledge is amazing, knowledge and information can be amazingly powerful (although also a real pointless time-waster), and whoever comes up with the next big idea for making all that text and images and sound and links and whatever make sense, mean something, to me, well, that’s human revolution for you.
You know what it comes down to? Everyone produces content into the web. I go to the web, and I say, I want info on this topic, in this form, to these specifications, kinda remixed to toss the crap I’m obviously not interested in, and tweaked to include stuff I didn’t ask for but would be real useful… and it comes back in a nice little bundle with cherries on top.
That’s real web for you.
Oh yeah, guess I should think about how to get stuff on the web easier, too.
Update time:
Work
One project down (GAZZ!, an SNS with a car-related theme), one project moving along with minimal assist from me, in a land far away, one project ramping up. The moving along project is a knowledge management system based upon the concept of social networking, the other is a bid to revolutionize the newspaper industry. Quite massive. I really dig the concept, mainly because it’s something I’ve been championing, plus I always love thinking about info organization and navigation on web pages.
Non-work life
Not much of that, but it currently revolves around my bike, friends from work, and a couple drinks now and then, work and otherwise. Last weekend was the ridiculous drinkout at Kawaguchiko (blessed with a view of Mt Fuji in the morning), Monday I snuck out for a “make friends” dinner courtesy of mixi, and Sunday was a road trip to the mountains west of Tokyo. Tomorrow I shall watch Buckcherry live. Not too bad, just need to add regular exercise to the mix.
Anime and manga and games
Mai Otome, despite my better judgement, is hilarious. Fan service taken to a new level. Seems people are beginning to acknowledge that there is a market for anime that caters just to hardcore fans. It’s pretty amazing to see how the fanbase has shaped this series, guess it shows the power of the net. I may have to blog this, if I get together the time and energy. Otherwise, things are a wash. No progress of Akai Ito. Perhaps I need an English RPG. Too much Japanese rots my brain.
That pic above, my friends, is of my new on-the-fly setup of projector (borrowed), PS2 (received as present) and Akai Ito (bought at Traders :P). It rocks, although ideally I would be able to throw up a larger image on my other – currently occupied by shelve – wall.
I also procured new flannel sheets and comforter cover, a goose down comforter, and nice furry bedspread, for about ¥20,000 total off the net. Come winter, I’m ready this time! Viva online shopping!
Being warm is nice. Buying stuff is nice. Playing with nice stuff you bought is nice.
Last weekend was brilliantly sunny, so much so that I gave up on my quest to reach a certain far off town by bike, because I was getting sunburnt, my eyes hurt from the glare, and the road I picked was pretty crummy. 50% chance of rain tomorrow, coupled with a very late night karaoke last night, pretty much kills my plans for a rematch. I think I will stay home with my furry bedspread and sheets and comforter, make friends with the PS2 and projector, and spend quality time trying to develop meaningful virtual relationships with 15 year old 2D girls in a vampire story.
Oh yeah, write another letter to Hekiru too. *sigh* worry about the girl…
Anyway, my declaration of a more moderate work life has been summarily banished to the far corners of dreamland fantasy. The “change the face of information creation and dessimination” project has revived, albeit in a somewhat more subdued, phased form, and yours truly is on it. Yes, I am estatic. Chance of a lifetime. No, really! I mean, I love what I’m doing, I just need less of the other shit I don’t like to deal with :P
What else has been memorable? I saw Sin City too, first time in a cinema in a while. It was okay, like Pulp Fiction crossed with Kill Bill but made lighter and more palatable. I actually liked it, the flawed but righteous characters and the impossibly beautiful women in that dark comic book world. Jessica Alba was amazing.
On the other hand of the spectrum, my ailing DVD drive revived barely enough for me to watch Saving Face, a film about an Asian American woman, her mother, and the relationships around them as they struggle with their real selves amidst the day-to-day of holding up the facade of what they are expected to be. I thought it might be interesting, I didn’t think it would leave such a lasting impression on me. Not for the story or movie, although certainly the portrayal of Chinese families manages to be pretty darn funny in its spot-on realism, and the fairy tale ending truly rules. No, I was just rather stunned by Wil, the main character – it was a bit like watching myself, that awkwardness, inability to express, the same very Chinese upbringing with a need to be outside that world. In a weird quirk, the character for her name is the same as mine. Luckily, my mother is much nicer and normal :D I think…
I wonder what my ending will be? At least recent experience has revived my confidence that my heart still does flipflops if I sit next to the right person 8D
10/11 Children of Bodom live at Shibuya-AX, damn awesome concert with my friend and I smack in front of the bass, headbanging and screaming, yeah. They seemed to like us quite a bit too, coz they were hanging on our side of the stage a lot :D
10/12 Day of death, bug check scramble before the up, plus I had to finish another project, madness. At least I got help on some outstanding projects, otherwise would’ve died or killed. Punched out at 4:17, Shiina Time, only good thing.
10/13 GAZZ! goes global, I feel better.
10/14 One year older. 人はどこへゆくの？
Thanks to friends, all of you.
Whoop! Mai Otome, that milk-it-for-all-it’s-worth-and-more alternative universe take on our favourite HiMEs, has started. Shit, it’s already October? Shoot me now, in one week I will be hitting the last year of my twenties. This sucks.
Lucky, then, that to drown my sorrows at my pitiful single existence working insane hours because it’s too boring to go home and too much of a pain to go out unless it was with someone I really like, we, ladies and gentlemen, have the ol’ BT really full tilt so I can catch a glimpse of Shizuru, RIGHT NOW DAMMIT!!!
I mean, check this out!
Dude if she looks this good in the actual show… *grins really stupid fangirl grin*
And not to be outdone, KOS-MOS comes back, looking reeeaaaal nice, and Shion, wow, Shion actually looks… awesome.
Then, we have Soul Calibur 3 coming, which although sorely lacking Seung Mina, makes up for it with a kickass game concept and extras. (See, it’s not just about the eye candy.)
Unfortunately, no other anime really catches my eye. But if I get my road bike, plus get around to some sort of display for this PS2 that a friend gave me, hell, I’d be playing Akai Ito and SC3 and Xenosaga and who the hell needs anime, anyway? :P
On the other hand, it does sound like I seriously need a life.
If I can only make it till the end of the month, yeah, bulk of work done, take vacation, maybe never come back.
Oh my god, I actually did this stuff for 7 hours a day 30 days a month all through winter semester, spring semester (with a sprinkling of Tale of Genji thesis) and right through summer vacation after graduation?!?!
What happens when you’re stuck home on a Friday night (and it’s a public holiday to boot), plus you’ve finished putting together a couple of shelves and have nothing better to do. Scrabbled together the sacrificeable Hekiru posters that I liked, snatched some FFAC poscards, cut out LOVELESS’s Kouya and Yamato poster, viola instant garish otaku wallpaper.
Do it yourself shelves, courtesy of a store called DOIT. Eh… Super cheap, with screws and screwdriver and a thingy that makes holes in wood, plus cutting to size, only 2150yen! Much happier now, will buy more pieces of wood to mash together.
Wow, talk about nostalgia time. A ton of work, and so it calls of sort of uppity background music to grease the ol’ brain cells.
Well, I ran Bakuretsu Hunter Vol2, and that was good, typical Kawai Kenji. A couple runs and I was ready for something else. So I scroll my iTunes collection, and what catches my eye? The Sailor Moon R Movie Soundtrack! Man, that really brings back memories! They have some great instrumentals, and then I got all nostalgic listening to the senshi voices *sigh*. And so I’m listening to my Sailor Moon R mirai he mukatte CD, and dang it, it really brings back memories.
You know Hisakawa Aya is okay, nice, but not as nice as I remember her to be. Ai no senshi is an awesome song though, and although Mitsuishi Kotono still is annoying, for some reason, she’s tolerable. Hmm, all those years of Hekiru have built my tolerance levels f^^;;
Gotta find that song that Ami-chan sings from season 1. Shit, I’m such an otaku.
Final Fantasy Advent Children comes out on the 14th of this month. I’m sitting in my room this Sunday, the rain falling outside, my somewhat hungover self listening to the FFVII soundtrack as I type out a report on this summer’s tour.
The music brings back memories. I love games, RPGs in particular. I used to wonder why I stopped playing games after graduating from college, but now I know it’s because I didn’t enjoy the act of playing as much as I did the immersion and the company of the people I was with when I played. It’s the nostalgia that really gets me, nowadays. I miss games, I miss the emotional kickback from a good RPG. RPGs are wonderful stories, sad and angsty and full of characters and plot twists and grand dreams. They are whole worlds.
I regret that I have not played any of the newer RPGs… in fact, Vagrant Story was perhaps the last of the lot. I never did complete Front Mission. I feel like I’ve missed out on all those worlds and stories and characters. As with anime, I like some so much that I devour fanfic religiously. It becomes a blur, what was canon and what is fanfic, but it meshes to create an experience so rich it’s addictive.
FFVII has incredible fanfiction, mostly dealing with Cloud and Sephiroth and Zack. Read Madamhydra’s massive work, or eukyrotic’s epic, or the vignettes by that person I can’t remember. They hit you so hard, so emotionally full, you could almost weep.
Nostalgic memories… I have so many nostalgic memories, I wish I could store them each and every one in a safe place in my mind, where they will never fade or be overwritten, or simply forgotten. I have so many good memories of old times, but when you struggle with the present, of being down or frustrated, I think I am in danger of losing them, of losing the “me” of that time to the worst of the present.
Perhaps I am simply obsessed with documenting the experiences of life. Ah, but that’s what blogging is for, non?
No, not autumn, we’re talking anime, dammit.
Yep, so new anime season. And. Still zero motivation to watch, much less blog. Why? It’s all crap man! What happened to all the yuri anime that was on last year! We want yuri! And don’t even try to tell me Gokujyou Seitoukai will do. Bleh.
Otome-Hime or whatever the sequel to Mai-Hime is is coming in October. I am ambivalent about pinning my hopes on this oasis in the midst of a terribly dry half year, ‘coz we all know Sunrise could just mess this up. If this become a harem anime, I will murder someone. Or perhaps just cry myself to sleep :P
On the other hand, I’ve been really into Full Metal Alchemist. That’s a really awesome manga, and I’m tempted to give the anime a try too. Uh, yeah, once I stop working like 90 hours++ a week.
And last but not least, I really have to write up a full report on the summer tour. It was too good, too varied, too insightful, and, considering that this could be another pivot point in Hekiru’s career, too damn important to pass up.
What do have to look forward to in September? Another trip to Heaven’s Door to watch some hard-rockin’ girls, and the last volume of Mai-Hime. Huh, to be honest, I’m no longer into ShizNat, the fandom’s morphed into some bizarre whatever.
On the other hand, last weekend’s trip to Karuizawa was freakin’ awesome. I spent waaaaaay too much money, bagging like 3 pairs of shoes and other miscellaneous shit. But damn it, they were damn good shoes, and cheap!
The soul is restless. I need to do something. Just gotta figure out, what it is I wanna do.
