Suddenly, a nagging feeling that I should be heading home
Phone call from my mom sparks a sudden reconsideration of my life here in Japan. The idea that I should be returning to the homestead, something that’s been curling away in the back of my mind for most of my life, is hit with a full blast of oxygen.
My dad runs some businesses, and he’s not young anymore. He’s damn good though, and he’s done very well. I studied econ, worked in M&A, picked up an MBA from a top school, and here I am, in Japan, trying to get massive websites up and loving it. It’s a massive waste, people say, that I’m not home helping my dad wheeling and dealing and making headlines and landmark takeovers or whatnot crap.
I know what I enjoy, and it’s not wheeling and dealing. But I also believe it is a waste that I’m not doing more with my dad. Hey, blaze of glory and all, I’m not immune, yeah?
This morning huge deal went through, and I can’t help but think, it’ll probably take me 10 years to pick up a fifth of what my dad knows, and I should go home and get started.
But, I know that I like it here too. Is it cowardice? But here, I’ve learned what it’s like to be in a permanent community, where every year friends go skiing together, where they throw b-day bashes every month for the people who were born that month, where people work so they can play, and play so they are sane for work, and nothing more.
God, what the hell should I do? I think if I had someone I loved, who loved me, I could go home, and do anything. In the end, is that all that matters?
One Response to “Suddenly, a nagging feeling that I should be heading home”
Speaking on behalf of the legions of workers who hate their job and literally force themselves to get up in the morning: Do what you enjoy doin’. Everything else will fall into place.
By punistation on Mar 30, 2006